The Fertility Mind Podcast
Welcome to my podcast. I share Raw, unfiltered stories of the Infertility world. Throughout the episodes, I share my own success with IVF, and you will hear from my guests about their success in the Fertility world. I will also share tools and techniques of Mindset and Manifestation. I have first-hand experience with how mindset and Manifestation changed the trajectory of my journey. I have since then applied this to every area of my life, and the transformation is beautiful. I know this is just the beginning. This podcast means so much to me because, In 2014, I found myself in the middle of the Fertility world, feeling alone and searching for hope. Everywhere I searched on social media, looking for a connection with others on the same infertility journey, I only found dwindling hope. In 2019, when I entered the Fertility world again, I reached out on social media, but it only seemed worse. It became my mission to spread hope with success stories, have open conversations about medical protocols and create connections. A positive community for others to feel supported, uplifted, and know they are not alone.
The Fertility Mind Podcast
S2 | E22 - Feeling the experience you want to have
**My website will be down for Upgrades and rebuilding for most of July. **
The podcast will still be running
Hey, Hey, Welcome back!
I am sharing why feeling the emotion you want to experience is so important. Being stuck in your current environment will perpetuate old habits, beliefs, etc. I say this all the time: FEELING is the secret.
I share a deeply personal journey on which I have finally been willing to put forth all my effort despite wanting this for years and really wanting this change. I was living in so many entanglements. This is much like fertility or any area of your life that doesn't seem to "work out" the way you hoped or is taking far longer than you ever imagined.
I share my new I've been working on the 8-week program, Ignite Fertility.
You don't want to miss this episode.
In love, light and gratitude
Jessica xxx
Link to The Power of Awareness
Email - jessica@thefertilitymind.com
Website - https://www.thefertilitymind.com
Amazon Store - https://www.amazon.com/author/thefertilitymind
Welcome to the Fertility Mind Podcast. I am your host, jessica Friesen, a certified fertility mindset coach, a sound healer and an international best-selling author. My mission for this podcast is to give you weekly episodes where you hear my own success with IVF and how mindset and manifestation changed it all for me. You will also hear from my guests who share their success stories in the fertility world. I want you to know that you are not alone. Even when things feel tough and when things feel like they aren't going your way. The tools and techniques you will get in this podcast, I know, can change everything for you too. So thanks for being here with me today and let's dive in. Hello and welcome back.
Speaker 1:Today's episode is all about feeling the experience as if it's already here. Experience as if it's already here, feeling the way you want to feel, feeling the experience that you want to experience versus feeling it now. So in other episodes I have shared that you are the how. The last episode, I talked to you about going on a mental diet. I want to take you further to you about going on a mental diet. I want to take you further. I want to take you further because there's a lot of questions of how am I the how? And it has everything to do with the feeling, because you can't manifest what you don't know you want. You can't manifest if you don't know that feeling, because you don't know it. So therefore it doesn't feel real to you, it doesn't feel true to you. But I also want to talk about manifesting. The word manifesting or manifestation to some it sounds unattainable or it sounds woo woo or mystical or magical. But the simplest form of manifestation is to bring it in to plain view. If you break it down like that, maybe that's easier to be like. Yeah, I can totally manifest my desires. I can totally manifest my desired dreams, my desired family. Because here's the thing you are worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy. There is nothing wrong with you. I know some of you may be getting teary-eyed and choked up right now. I want to share this with you before I go into the full episode.
Speaker 1:I had a conversation with a prospect client. She and I were having a conversation on the phone and we were talking about everything that she's gone on her fertility journey. She's been on her fertility journey for four years. Her and her husband are trying. Naturally they're interested in holistic approach. They're okay with doing, you know, seeing a naturopathic doctor. They're okay with vitamins, they are okay with acupuncture, but the idea of actual being in a fertility clinic on fabricated synthetic medications and the whole process of IVF doesn't feel in alignment with what they want to do.
Speaker 1:I said amazing, that's okay. So I asked her. I said how would you like to feel? And she listed to me all the feelings that she didn't want to feel. I don't want to feel isolated. I don't want to feel left behind. I don't want to feel broken. I don't want to see another pregnancy test that comes back negative. I don't want the anxiety, the pressure. I don't want this feeling. And I said amazing, you know exactly what you don't want. So what do you want? How do you want to feel?
Speaker 1:And she got choked up and she said well, I can easily list off a bunch of things. And she said but I feel like I'm supposed to really think about this. I said, yeah, think about how you would really love to feel. But I said let me take this one step further. I said if you had your baby in your arms right now, how would you feel? What would you do differently than what you're doing right now. And she said I would just feel love and joy, I would feel gratitude. I would look at life so differently. I would feel like I can relate again to my family, to my friends. I could relate to and do all the things that I wanted to do. I would be feeling all the things I want to feel. And I said keep tapping into those feelings.
Speaker 1:And I said to her I said I want you to write five end scenes. I said but before you write those five end scenes, I said if you could have everything that you want, what would you want? She said I want to have multiple pregnancies, have everything that you want. What would you want? She said I want to have multiple pregnancies. She said but I'm so focused on just one because right now we can't even just have one, so the idea of thinking about one or two or three or four pregnancies is just insanity. And I said so write your end scenes that you get to interchange all the time. Write out and end scene with your first pregnancy and life while baby's here, and then now baby's here and your second pregnancy or third pregnancy, whatever feels right, in an alignment with you.
Speaker 1:She was just sobbing on the phone and she said I don't know the last time I actually thought about what I really wanted, because all I can think about is how it's not working. All I can think about is how my friends and I used to see each other so often and now it's not often at all. Because I don't relate, I don't feel comfortable. I get a lot of questions of why don't I just go to IUI or IVF? And she said I'm sick of explaining myself to people why I don't want to do it. And she said because it feels like I'm going against the grain, that I should just conform to the next steps. And I just I looked at her through the phone and I just said I'm sending you love and I repeated to her that she is worthy and that she is powerful and I gave her some homework to do. I also talked to her about self-image, which is lesson six in fertility fusion.
Speaker 1:I talked to her about how it was so important you need to be in order to do, in order to have. So be the version right now, showing up right now how you would if your desired family was already here. You wouldn't have the stress. You wouldn't have the stress, you wouldn't have the anxiety, you wouldn't be holding on to those lower negative vibrational emotions because you already have it. So I said, start showing up that way at work right now. And I told her. I said this is what I used to do when I was at work while I was on a fertility journey. I would tell myself all day I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant because I knew in all reality I wasn't. However, you don't feel the movement of your baby till minimum 17 weeks, usually not until you're 20 plus weeks you'll start feeling movement of a baby. So I'd sit there I'm pregnant, I'm pregnant, I'm pregnant. And people started saying to me you've got to glow, like what's different, and I was like nothing, but in my mind I'm like, well, I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant Even though I wasn't.
Speaker 1:When my older girls were at their mom's house and it was just my husband and I, I started playing end scenes that I had freedom. I started playing end scenes that I had freedom. I had freedom to do things now because I was. I was pregnant, baby wasn't here, so it was okay to go out on date nights, it was okay to do this. But then I'd also play end scenes of them as teenagers not actually like the teenage years. But I was like, you know, when my babies are teenagers, I'll have freedom to for day, nights. I'll have freedom to do this because they're at work or they're, you know, maybe they're off in post-secondary school. Wherever they are, I just have more freedom. I could interchange those feelings and those thoughts because I knew the freedom, because half the time my older girls were at their mom's house. And, yes, my dynamic, my family dynamic, was different, because I didn't get to date my husband for a couple of years and go on all of these trips and do all of these things and then get married. As soon as I met my husband, there was already three little girls in the picture. We instantly became a ready-made family. So I didn't get to do all those things. So I didn't get to do all those things.
Speaker 1:I'm sharing this with you because I want to read a few paragraphs from the desire chapter of the awakened imagination by Neville Goddard. And sorry, not the awakened imagination, um, my goodness, bless my words. The Power of Awareness by Neville Goddard. I could not think of that. I have also read the Awakened Imagination by him, but the Power of Awareness is such a great book and it really solidifies this, but I also wanted to share something with you guys. I feel like it's time to share.
Speaker 1:Whether it takes my cloud away or not, you're going to start seeing a new version of me showing up on the podcast. For the last two weeks I haven't published an episode. I was feeling guilty. I had episodes recorded, I was going to release them, I had them loaded in the system and then I took them off and I thought no, it just doesn't feel right.
Speaker 1:It took losing my dog of almost 16 years to start journaling on a bubble sheet about freedom and realizing I've never fully allowed myself to be free to be me, free to be me on the podcast, free to be me out in public, free to be me. Even in my unattached years, when I had the utmost freedom, when I didn't have a mortgage or I didn't have bills to pay, I didn't fully allow myself full expression. I didn't allow myself to fully be me and, in all fairness, I felt a bit like a fraud. I could absolutely talk your ears off of fertility, because that is something that I conquered and I've shared with you. I always went back to my fertility journey. How did I do something so different? I died to a version of me that believed that I wasn't worthy. I died to a version of me that believed that I wasn't worthy. I died to a version of me that believed things weren't possible for me. I died to the version of me that kept saying my fertility journey was hard. Because I will say this guys, I know your fertility journey is hard and you will. You could talk my ear off till the sun comes down about how hard your fertility journey is, but you must die to that version. It has been hard up until this moment. From this moment forward, it's no longer hard.
Speaker 1:You get to choose to experience how you want to feel. You get to choose to live in your imagination. Because the beautiful thing about our memory we can instantly recall a feeling. But we can start recreating our memories by going in our imagination and seeing your life play out as if it's already happened. And our mind doesn't know if it's past or or present. It's happening right now. It just knows to recall something. So the more you recall your end scenes, the more you recall you showing up the way you would if you had all your desired manifestations. You become that vibrational match. You've tuned into that frequency and you're holding that frequency and you're sustaining it a lot longer.
Speaker 1:It's like riding a bike the more you do it, the easier it gets. The first time you did it, maybe you ran into a curb like I did and flew off the handlebars and scraped your chin. I still kept going back. I'm like no, I'm determined, I'm going to ride my bike. Be determined to be in your imagination, be determined so the how can unfold for you because you are the how. But if you don't know that feeling, the unfolding is not going to unfold the way you want it to or the way you think it should. Or maybe it takes longer because you can't manifest what you don't know how you want to feel. So get in there and do that.
Speaker 1:But here's the thing I always go back to my fertility journey because I did something and I can manifest money. I have an amazing relationship with my husband. But my blended family life for years upon years, my words always were subliminally and sometimes vocally. It is what it is. It is what it is. I can't change that. I have stepdaughters yes, I could, but that's not a route I ever want to take. But it is what it is, that I'm in a blended family. So I'm harvesting the good, forgetting the rest. But I was still perpetuating old feelings, old feelings of unworthiness.
Speaker 1:That again, I'm not going into detail, but the easiest way to say it is that my blended family life was not all rainbows and hearts and unicorn farts. It wasn't all sparkly rainbows. There was a lot of contrast, there was a lot of turmoil. I had this vision of how I wanted our blended family to be like, and when it wasn't like that, I was feeling like a failure, I was feeling disappointed, I was feeling let down. And then I started thinking to myself okay, I've got this grand vision of what I want, I know how to manifest, I know how to do this, but maybe I just can't hear because there's so many circumstances, so many external things that are at play here. So this, and then I went even deeper and I said to myself what is what if this is something that I truly want? But what if they don't? What if they just don't want what I want? And I would feel hurt and I would feel sad and I would just think, like it is what it is. I'm harvesting the good, I'm going to enjoy the ride because I want them here, and my older girl. My, my little, my littlest ones love their sisters. I love them. I want this amazing thing, but it wasn't unfolding and it took.
Speaker 1:It took losing my dog for me to start journaling freedom for me to start saying stop feeling like this. I have the freedom to be me. My girl's soul is free and she's watching me and she is now more connected to me. Now than ever, I started saying things differently, I started feeling things differently, but I uncovered a lot of negative feelings that kept perpetuating forward and I kept just falling into the entrapment of. You know, there's just so many external factors that are at play here, so I can't. I can't do this. This is okay, this is I thought. No, I am allowed to hold my dream and as long as I really go into my imagination, see how I want it to be, and I start acting as if it's already happening and I asked myself would I be acting differently than I am right now? And if the answer is yes, then I know there's work to do.
Speaker 1:But I was holding on to this. I'm feeling like a fraud because when it comes to fertility, oh my gosh, I know what I'm talking about. I absolutely know what I'm talking about. But when it came to my blended family life, I thought I'm talking about mindset and manifestation. Yet this one area I just can't change. But it is what it is. I'm sharing this with you now because you're going to see me different, you're going to hear me different, because I am taking my own steps, my own teachings and applying it, and I'm not scared to do it anymore. I'm not scared of being hurt, I'm not scared of letting, being let down. I'm not scared of saying but what if this just won't work? What if this is just not for me? So you'll hear me different and I'm sharing this with you because I want you to know I'm being honest and truthful that I was going through something too to the point that I wasn't. I wasn't publishing my podcasts. I just felt like no, it's okay. And I thought but what do I love? I love helping.
Speaker 1:I was busy creating another program called Ignite Fertility, because the abbreviation is IF, because it's all about self-image. But what if it actually works? Because it does. If you do this, you will see very different results. Ignite Fertility is an eight-week program. It is all about self-image and I am so excited. It is an add-on or it's something you can do, completely separate of Fertility Fusion or Fertility Fusion VIP.
Speaker 1:I know how to keep myself busy and that's the thing I was creating, something I'm so passionate about, something I was so excited about, but still not wanting to have to face, not wanting to have to die to the version of me because, guys, I know how easy it is to hear something and then instantly combat it with why it wouldn't work. Because I have this diagnosis, or I've been on this journey for this long, or my relationship is not as strong as it was at the beginning with my partner, or I don't have a support system, or I don't have this, I don't have that. My doctor said this, this or this, said that. I understand those feelings because I can instantly still say well, if this, then that, and I go. No, the version of me that has all of this already. How would she act? How would she show up? How would she feel? And, yeah, more often than not, 99.9% of the time, I'm not. I didn't show up as her.
Speaker 1:I was subliminally perpetuating forward old beliefs, old patterns, old thoughts, old everything. I wanted to share this with you because I really think being fully transparent and being fully honest is absolutely the best and for you to know that I still take my own advice, follow this, the same tools and techniques, and do everything that I can possibly do. But I also wanted to share this with you of the power of awareness by Neville Goddard. But I also wanted to share this with you of the Power of Awareness by Neville Goddard. The very first paragraph he says the changes which take place in your life as a result of your change concept of yourself always appear to the enlightened to be the result not of a change of your consciousness, but of chance, outer cause or coincidence. However, the only fate governing your life is the fate determined by your own concepts, your own assumptions, for an assumption, though false if persisted, will harden the fact. So the changes that you start making within yourself right now, acting as if it's already happened, versus once it happens, then you can do this, acting as if you already have it now these will harden into fact because your assumptions and your concepts are different, versus. So if you don't die to the version that you are right now, where you believe it's not possible for me, or I don't know if it's possible for me, or that this is really hard, up until this moment you're right. It has been hard, but from this moment going forward, you get to choose. You get to choose.
Speaker 1:Then another paragraph says Everything depends on your attitude towards yourself. That which you will not affirm as true to yourself can never be realized by you. So if you don't affirm this to be true, you may not be realizing this. This may always stay in the ether. I would love to have this, but I don't.
Speaker 1:And here's the thing the longer you are on your fertility journey, your self-image starts to get hurt, then bruised, then wounded and then, in most cases, completely obliterated. So start creating your self-image that you want now, the self-image that you would have if your goals, desires and dreams were here, if your goals, desires and dreams were here. Because he says, for the attitude alone, the necessary condition which you is, the necessary condition by which you realize your goal, it's your attitude towards this. So if you keep perpetuating forward the fear, the fear that it hasn't worked this far, what if it doesn't work? If you keep perpetuating forward the hurt, the frustration, the anger, the brokenness, the not fitting in with your friends, that will all change. It will stay the same. It will change when you change your attitude, when you start stepping into the new version of you. Then he goes on to say if you do not believe who you are, quote, unquote the new version of you. Then he goes on to say if you do not believe who you are, quote, unquote the person you want to be, then you remain as you are. Through the faithful, systematic cultivation of the feeling of the wish fulfilled, desire becomes the promise of its own fulfillment. The assumption of the feeling of the wish fulfilled makes the future dream into a present fact.
Speaker 1:In the show notes I will link the book to Neville Goddard. I don't have affiliate fees or anything, association or anything. I just absolutely love this book and if you can read it and then apply it to you and your fertility journey, I know you will see things leap off the page like I do, but I want you to know you. You are worthy. The same as me talking to my prospect client and her getting choked up and saying I don't remember the last time I actually thought about what I really, really, really wanted, or solidifying that that could happen, because I'm always just staying in this hope state. We're having sex, so hopefully this will work. That's what we're going to do. I'm doing acupuncture, I'm taking vitamins, but the perpetuating thought is the fear of what if another month goes by? How much longer are we going to keep putting ourselves through this because it's not proving to work? What if this is just our life, that we are just us, with no children? I am so, so, so excited to have these conversations with you. I'm so excited to share my podcast with you. I'm so excited to share new readings that I read with you.
Speaker 1:Guys, I just want you to know that you have so much power within you, but we give away our power. We give away our power because we go to instinct. Our instinct is to go to what we know. Our instinct is to keep perpetuating forward. I'll leave you with this, and I could go on and on and on. I promise I really could.
Speaker 1:But if you took an acorn, you know that acorn will turn into an oak tree. If you took that acorn the acorn it's instinct to grow into an oak tree. It's not instinct to become a lime tree, a lemon tree, a fruit tree. It will always become that oak tree. It's the same thing as our instinct. That's why you need to die to the version of you that holds all of the negative thinking that holds all of the feelings that it's not going to happen, that keeps perpetuating forward what you keep recalling that you've experienced so far in your fertility journey, that makes it feel so hard. Start changing your instinct to go to your imagination, to go to the place of the wish fulfilled, to go to the place of where you want to feel and empower yourself, versus not and just being in your five senses, perpetuating forward all of the experiences you've already experienced, because you won't experience anything other than what you're experiencing, when that is your main dialogue, when that is your main feeling, when that is all that you can eat, breathe and sleep.
Speaker 1:I love you so much and I am so proud of you and I am so beyond grateful that you are here, listening, trying to do things differently. I love you so much and I really, really, really cannot wait to see you in Ignite Fertility or Fertility Fusion or Fertility Fusion VIP. I am sending you all my love and all my light. Have an amazing day. I want to express my deepest gratitude for you tuning in with me today. I am proud of you and I am sending you so much love. I want you to remember that you hold incredible strength and power within you. If this episode resonated with you or you know anyone that would benefit from hearing, please share, and if you haven't done so already, head over to Spotify or Apple and please leave a rating and a review In love and light, jessica.